“I want a divorce.”
If you’re like many people in Fort Collins (or anywhere else, for that matter), you’ve said those words – but how do you know if it’s really the right choice?
I Want a Divorce: How to Know if You Should Divorce Your Spouse
Divorce is a choice that nobody makes lightly. And while there’s no one-size-fits-all answer to whether you should stay or go, there are some signs that it’s healthier for you and your family if you end your marriage.
People talk to our attorneys for a variety of reasons – infidelity, a lack of intimacy, or even simply because they’ve grown apart from their spouses – but not all of them are ready to divorce, even when their marriages are beyond repair.
First things first: You may be the type of person who wants to give your marriage a last-ditch effort to find out whether you’re making the right decision. If you’ve already done that, or if you simply don’t believe your marriage will last, here’s how you can tell it’s time to file for divorce:
- You have a plan for your future
- You’ve dealt with – or know how to deal with – the emotions associated with divorce
- You understand that divorce causes a ripple effect, and you’re prepared to deal with it
Your Plan for the Future
Many people who are headed for divorce begin planning a future – one without their spouse in it – long before they show up in a divorce attorney’s office. Maybe you’ve looked at apartments, or perhaps you’ve been daydreaming about being single.
But daydreaming and actually creating a plan are two different things.
A plan includes actually finding a place to live (side note: don’t move out of your marital home until you’ve talked to your attorney), figuring out a child custody arrangement and working out childcare arrangements, and zeroing in on your finances so you’re ready for the next phase of your life.
Dealing With the Emotions Associated With Divorce
Even if your marriage has been over for quite some time, you’ll still go through a wide range of emotions during your divorce. Divorce is a loss, which often results in grief – and if you have children, you’ll have to help them manage their emotions, too. It’s about more than grief, though. Big changes are hard, even if you’re prepared for them, and adjusting to a new lifestyle can bring on its own set of emotions.
Divorce’s “Ripple Effect”
Divorce affects every area of your life. It’ll make changes to your finances, your lifestyle and even your family traditions. It affects your children (though typically this is only temporary), and it puts you in a position that no longer has the stability and predictability your marriage once had. Some of your friends may choose sides in your divorce, while others might worry that your divorce is “contagious” and keep their distance. You have to be prepared for those changes before you file – otherwise, your divorce could be more difficult than it needs to be.
Do You Need to Talk to a Fort Collins Divorce Lawyer?
Talking to a divorce attorney doesn’t mean you’re getting a divorce. Instead, it’s what smart people do to learn about their options. If you’d like to talk to a lawyer about what your future might hold, call us at 970-488-1887 for a free divorce consultation with an attorney right now. We’ll answer your questions about child custody and child support, spousal maintenance (alimony), property division and other divorce matters.